Your Autistic Life: The Ruminations of an Autistic Enby

This is my blog. I masked my autism for the first 50 years of my life. I discovered in March 2023 that I am, in fact, autistic. Prior to this time, my life was mostly okay, but did not make much sense overall. Since my self-diagnosis, my life makes much more sense.

If you don’t know where to start on this site, this page has the articles you should read first.

Premium articles can be found here, besides appearing in the other sections.

Editorials:

  • The Measure Of An Enby

    Am I nonbinary? The signs point to the fact that I am. When you’ve met one enby, you’ve met one enby. I realized that this motto was true even before meeting one enby as an enby on a dating app. I suspect I have met some enbies a long time ago, but I did not…

  • My Policy About Boosting Fediverse Posts

    My boosting behavior mostly reflects my desire to have a tidy timeline. I like a tidy timeline devoid of tons of stuff that I won’t want to read. I also think that I cannot hold others to a high standard of discrimination in boosting, if I don’t hold myself to that very same standard. It…

  • Trans Kids Shouldn’t Have To Hide Who They Are From Their Parents

    I’m sorry to report that most parents fail horribly in this matter. Recently, a trans kid was asking how to buy binders without their parents knowing about it. This request saddened me. No, not because the kid is trans. I am saddened because, as is usually the case with trans kids, the parents are not…

Random Articles:

  • Dating Advice For Autistic People: I Cannot Recommend Hiki

    I cannot recommend Hiki for anyone, alas. Here is what I wrote in the fediverse soon after I joined Hiki: Hiki does not seem to be set in a way that readily allows me to find the people who would like someone like me. For me, this is reminiscent of Tinder. My experience on Tinder…

  • Stimming Is Life 14

    More music to stim to. Things of note… I believe this is a first in our series. The songwriter of Your Woman, Jyoti Mishra (@Jyoti) is in the fediverse! Do say hi, especially if you like the song! Danger Mouse is very present in this playlist. He’s a member Gnarls Barkley and Broken Bells. No,…

  • The Distinction Between Migrant And Expat May Not Be The One You Think

    The wrong definition will mark you as someone fighting the wrong battle. If you insist that by definition expat means white skin, while migrant means person of color, what you are engaging in is performative social justice and virtue signaling. “Look at how virtuous I am!” What you are doing actually helps no one. Moreover,…

Latest Articles:

  • Why I Usually Don’t Get All Pissy When A Relationship Fails

    Two hands reaching for one another.

    I don’t like drama. Finding a picture for this article was hard. That’s because a lot of the pictures I found imply feelings that I don’t have. (I’m not crushed, or angry, etc.) Or they imply the end of a long and intense relationship. It wasn’t the case here. My latest date told me minutes…

  • A Senseless Breakup As a Zen Koan

    A Japanese gate jutting out of the water.

    She put me in an impossible situation, and gave me the gift of a koan. I’m still reeling from the worst breakup of my life. Well, the worst breakup so far. There’s no telling if something even worse will come some day. It’s been almost two years, but last night a song came up and…

  • Gift Giving: A Minefield

    A minefield with sings indicating that it is a minefield

    I’m both a bad giver and a bad receiver of gifts, according to society, at any rate. Gift giving is a minefield for most autistic folks. It definitely is one for me. Since Valentine’s Day is upon us, here’s a reflection on why most options are terrible. In no specific order, A great part of…

  • Is Meditation More Pleasurable Than Sex?

    What being neurodivergent and queer has taught me about this question. There is frank talk about sex in what follows here, including masochism. In my view, it is light talk, but reader beware. From time to time I see claims that meditation is indeed more pleasurable than sex. Wow! Let’s reach for the meditation cushion…

  • Getting Rid of Old Shit

    I’m lightening the load. Don’t think for one second that getting rid of old shit is easy for me. I do find all kinds of reasons to keep stuff around, but life events sometimes insist on your making the decision to get rid of shit. My divorce was such an event. I had to part…

  • On Zen Practice

    The revolutionary art of unlearning. I don’t think that what follows is especially original. It was probably communicated to me at the beginning of my practice, but I was too bewildered and stupid to understand it. It is only now, after years of practice, that I finally understand what was communicated. When I talk about…

Latest Videos From My YouTube Channel:

  • Screw You!

    Finn is literally falling into a trap, or is it figuratively? https://youtube.com/shorts/T6Zsk6iM25A?feature=share

  • Eating Your Feelings

    Finn has been in the bathroom for a while, processing his feelings. https://youtube.com/shorts/gxMPQjWdqfA

  • Sliced Muenster Cheese

    Finn gets sliced monster for Alice. https://youtube.com/shorts/qt2cMb-qayA?feature=share

Latest Music:

  • Stimming Is Life 009

    More music to stim to. The music video for I Appear Missing is a big gory. Also, I picked the audio of Miracle for the YouTube playlist. There is an official music video, but it is not safe for work. If you want to see it, you’ll have to work for it.

  • Stimming Is Life 008

    More music to stim to. Lest you think that I’m making these playlists just for you. No, I’m making them for myself. I’ve been stimming to the following playlist for a few weeks now on my daily walks, and on the subway. Oh, Tranz by Gorillaz is a bit fast, but it is sooo gooooood!…

  • Stimming Is Life 007

    A playlist of music I stim to. The playlist on YouTube: The playlist on Spotify: Get your very own Stimming is Life sweatshirt in my Bonfire store: