Your Autistic Life

Your Autistic Life: The Ruminations of an Autistic Enby

This is my blog. I masked my autism for the first 50 years of my life. I discovered in March 2023 that I am, in fact, autistic. Prior to this time, my life was mostly okay, but did not make much sense overall. Since my self-diagnosis, my life makes much more sense.

If you don’t know where to start on this site, this page has the articles you should read first.

Premium articles can be found here, besides appearing in the other sections.

Editorials:

  • The Measure Of An Enby

    Am I nonbinary? The signs point to the fact that I am. When you’ve met one enby, you’ve met one enby. I realized that this motto was true even before meeting one enby as an enby on a dating app. I suspect I have met some enbies a long time ago, but I did not…

  • My Policy About Boosting Fediverse Posts

    My boosting behavior mostly reflects my desire to have a tidy timeline. I like a tidy timeline devoid of tons of stuff that I won’t want to read. I also think that I cannot hold others to a high standard of discrimination in boosting, if I don’t hold myself to that very same standard. It…

  • Trans Kids Shouldn’t Have To Hide Who They Are From Their Parents

    I’m sorry to report that most parents fail horribly in this matter. Recently, a trans kid was asking how to buy binders without their parents knowing about it. This request saddened me. No, not because the kid is trans. I am saddened because, as is usually the case with trans kids, the parents are not…

Random Articles:

  • The Measure Of An Enby

    Am I nonbinary? The signs point to the fact that I am. When you’ve met one enby, you’ve met one enby. I realized that this motto was true even before meeting one enby as an enby on a dating app. I suspect I have met some enbies a long time ago, but I did not…

  • At 50 I’m Realizing I’m Not Made To Live Alone

    Most of the time, these days, I live alone. My mental health is suffering from it. I initially wrote this article in March 2023. I’m republishing it here with minimal edits. I’ll provide an update at the end. This is a realization that came to me only very recently… during the past few weeks, actually. I…

  • My Suffering Is For All Sentient Beings

    Although my life used to be lived for myself, it is now lived for others. When I began to practice Zen, my goal was to reach enlightenment as fast as possible. I was sitting, mostly for my own benefit. I’ve sat in meditation on and off for over 27 years. Furthermore, I’ve been to seven-day…

Latest Articles:

  • I Like Repetition

    There are multiple ways in which repetition is a feature of my life. Society tells us that repetition is a bad thing. Then again, society is dominated by neurotypical people. I’m neurodivergent, autistic, and thus my relationship with repetition is more complex than what society tells us. My choice of clothing shows a desire for…

  • Stimming

    I’ve stimmed all my life, but its manifestation has changed over time. As I reflect on earlier episodes in my life, I realize that a lot of the symptoms associated with autism were present in me, but masked. I’ve stimmed way before my cancer weakened my ability to mask, but I did not know what…

  • Social Anxiety

    Social interactions have always been difficult. As a general observation, social interactions have always proved to be a minefield for me. I did my best to step carefully through this minefield, but I did step on some landmines. I thought that was just me being “quirky” but I think now it is my autism. Truth…

  • No Social Media Icons For Sharing On This Site

    I’ve thought about it, but I decided against it. Maybe I’m acting against my own best interests here… but it seems to me rather frivolous to add a strip of icons on every page so that users can share the stuff here to some social media platform. If you want to share, you can do…

Latest Videos From My YouTube Channel:

  • Screw You!

    Finn is literally falling into a trap, or is it figuratively? https://youtube.com/shorts/T6Zsk6iM25A?feature=share

  • Eating Your Feelings

    Finn has been in the bathroom for a while, processing his feelings. https://youtube.com/shorts/gxMPQjWdqfA

  • Sliced Muenster Cheese

    Finn gets sliced monster for Alice. https://youtube.com/shorts/qt2cMb-qayA?feature=share

Latest Music:

  • Stimming Is Life 002

    A playlist for those who like to stim to music. One thing I found that 120 beats per minute (BPM) may be close to my limit when I walk. I may have songs that go above this limit, but if they are too fast, then I just hand-dance and forget about walk-dancing. If you want…

  • Stimming Is Life 001

    A playlist for those who like to stim to music. I’m a late-diagnosed autistic, and yes I did self-diagnose. For the longest time I was able to mask, but my cancer lessened my ability. Yet, if I look back at my life, I was stimming years before my cancer. One form of stimming for me…