Your Autistic Life: The Ruminations of an Autistic Enby

This is my blog. I masked my autism for the first 50 years of my life. I discovered in March 2023 that I am, in fact, autistic. Prior to this time, my life was mostly okay, but did not make much sense overall. Since my self-diagnosis, my life makes much more sense.

If you don’t know where to start on this site, this page has the articles you should read first.

Premium articles can be found here, besides appearing in the other sections.

Editorials:

  • UnitedHealth’s Stupidity Is Suffocating

    What kind of idiots run this company?????????? UnitedHealth was hit in a data breach. They did exactly what you should not do. For fuck’s sake! You do not need to be a genius to fucking know what I’m going to fucking tell you here. If you guessed that I am mad, well, bingo! You win…

  • The Examined Life

    The discovery of my neurodivergence has been a blessing in disguise, for, together with other crises, it forced me to examine my life. I know for a fact that some people won’t accept that neurodivergence is a blessing at all. These folks sometimes wish that they would be able to do away with their own…

  • Why Do Autistic People “Make A Scene?”

    Because you don’t bloody listen. Going to events can be challenging when you are autistic. It is definitely challenging for me. I have noise sensitivity and social anxiety. I’ve recently learned that I’m liable to crash if I’m overstimulated during a social event. Fun! I’m going to talk about a specific event here. It is…

Random Articles:

  • Social Anxiety

    Social interactions have always been difficult. As a general observation, social interactions have always proved to be a minefield for me. I did my best to step carefully through this minefield, but I did step on some landmines. I thought that was just me being “quirky” but I think now it is my autism. Truth…

  • National Days And Awareness Months Hurt My Mental Health

    There’s a cost to your push for awareness, and it is my mental health. Let’s start with the messages about National Pizza Day or National Ice Cream Day. These are pure advertisement for special interests. They serve no other purpose than to place some class of product into the population’s mind. They have no other…

  • Famotidine Was Making Me Depressed And Caused Fatigue

    More reflections on my experience with famotidine. Preamble: I wrote this piece in August 2022, about six days after my previous piece on famotidine. I decided to do minimal edits before publishing it here. In particular, I did not adjust the chronology. I did not know I was autistic at the time. However, I’m now…

Latest Articles:

  • My Sleep Ritual

    This is what I have to do if I want a good night of sleep. You need to be logged in to view the rest of the content. Please Log In. Not a Member? Join Us

  • Willow

    A daddy’s girl Buddhist funeral. A lynx-point female Siamese catWillow was her assigned nameTruly, she was a daddy’s girlShe never learned claw controlWhen this girl showed her loveShe’d put her paw on your armAnd immediately drew bloodStill, I let her do it. No fuss from meBecause she was my sweet girl When I went to…

  • A Panic Attack May Not Be What You Think

    I’m going to explain to you what a panic attack is. It does not just mean experiencing a great fear or being terrified irrespective of circumstances. I’ve experienced two bouts of panic attacks in my life. I had to take Xanax to counter the attacks until time worked its magic, and the attacks ceased. A…

  • I Cannot Recommend BetterHelp

    They sell customer data to third parties, and my ex-wife and I had terrible experiences with them. I cannot recommend BetterHelp to anyone. It is really disheartening to see YouTube creators endorse this place as if it were the second coming. My ex-wife and I have had a terrible experience with them. They have moreover…

  • The Girl Who Mistook Me For A Pile Of Bricks

    I wanted to give her everything, but she backstabbed me. I’ve mentioned it before. The queer world is rather small. You should be nice to the people you run into, even when breaking up with them. If you do not, you may get a cold reception the next time you run into them. I wanted…

  • The Distinction Between Migrant And Expat May Not Be The One You Think

    The wrong definition will mark you as someone fighting the wrong battle. If you insist that by definition expat means white skin, while migrant means person of color, what you are engaging in is performative social justice and virtue signaling. “Look at how virtuous I am!” What you are doing actually helps no one. Moreover,…

Latest Videos From My YouTube Channel:

  • Spinning Class

    Finn bought a new chair for spinning class. (Decided to leave the exaggerated laughs that the AI produced, as-is.) https://youtu.be/-tvs6vVNU7c

  • Doing Adult Stuff

    Finn is trying to convey to Alice that he’s adulting. https://youtube.com/shorts/aoD9RDLr3qQ?feature=share

  • Flushies

    Finn has a new idea for a stuffed toy. https://youtube.com/shorts/37wY9292Qhc?feature=share

Latest Music:

  • Stimming Is Life 002

    A playlist for those who like to stim to music. One thing I found that 120 beats per minute (BPM) may be close to my limit when I walk. I may have songs that go above this limit, but if they are too fast, then I just hand-dance and forget about walk-dancing. If you want…

  • Stimming Is Life 001

    A playlist for those who like to stim to music. I’m a late-diagnosed autistic, and yes I did self-diagnose. For the longest time I was able to mask, but my cancer lessened my ability. Yet, if I look back at my life, I was stimming years before my cancer. One form of stimming for me…